Union Solution
Unions are a scourge of the earth! They gather together the masses to gouge their fellows in providing minimal services while reaping unheard of benefits for their members. Collective bargaining indeed! When you’re old and in the way, have the grace to step aside. Never mind about this sick leave and tenure and health insurance and pay raises. Bob Dylan said it best when he wrote his anti-union song, thinly disguised as a song regarding progressive protest, “Come mothers and fathers throughout the land. And don’t criticize what you can’t understand. Your sons and your daughters are beyond your command. Your old roads are rapidly aging. Get out of the new one if you can’t lend a hand, for the times they are a changing.”Wisconsin’s Governor, the right Honorable Scott Walker has it right. The teachers’ unions are wreaking havoc upon the otherwise fragile economy of Wisconsin. Likewise with nurses, police and fire fighters.
While the upstanding citizens supporting our untaxed stock transfer businesses are sorely burdened with the weight of financing these otherwise untoward entitlements, they suffer the barbs thrown at them by the left leaners controlling the press and other media.
It suddenly came upon me in a flash. We can save billions in otherwise mis-spent infrastructure dollars while placing a solid value proposition within the confines of a self determined economy.
Consider the following. There are approximately 2.2 million adults incarcerated and over 7.2 million adults on probation in these United States. Consider such an untapped resource as the, yet to be fully realized, Alaska pipeline. Consider the enormous loss of productivity. Aside from producing license plates, the majority of the time an incarcerated inmate spends involves sleeping, attempting DNA based appeals, sodomizing their cellmates and attaching ‘LOVE’ tattoos on their knuckles. Consider the structures within which they are housed, not including the half-way houses within which some of the parolees reside.
It would seem that rather than have this untapped resource idling their hours by lifting weights, busting stones, and cleaning highway shoulders, a greater benefit can be reaped by having these same individuals, as a condition of their incarceration and as an incentive for either more lenient conditions or earlier release dates, these grossly under-utilized resources could serve as the replacement for the infrastructure currently and quickly eroding the fabric of our economy.
We could have the current inmate population serve as educators, fire fighters, nurses and law enforcement agents.
In Wisconsin alone there are 32 prisons and correctional facilities with an average inmate population of approximately 1,000 males per institution. There are currently approximately 60,000 teachers in Wisconsin.
With a little bit of belt tightening in these tough times we can arrive at a relatively mundane solution towards the resolution of Wisconsin’s woes.
Let’s start by increasing the classroom size to 50. I’m sure you feel as I do, that this namby pamby business of personalized teaching is just so much tree hugging nonsense. In the old days, a teacher taught in a classroom that was filled to the brim with kids of all ages and abilities. It was her job to make sure everyone received their book learning. Nowadays, the save-the-snail-darter types want a one to one relationship between teacher and student and they should be insightful towards the sufferings of the student who may exhibit signs of varying attention deficit disorders, glutin and lactose intolerances, overly sensitive sensibilities or various and sundry sexual orientations.
Enough of this! Lump ‘em all together like they did in the good old days. And if they fall behind, they fall behind.
These existing inmates would, for mere pennies on the dollar I might add, assume the responsibilities of those overpaid individuals in receipt of princely benefits, charged with the education of our youth. In so converting, this would reduce the burden upon our tax payers by enormous levels.
The same would hold for nurses, fire fighters and local law enforcement. All of these individuals hide behind the skirts of their union representatives making wholesale and outlandish demands of their neighbors.
Consider the number of schools, hospitals, fire houses and police stations the tax payers are called upon to support. These edifices are currently filled with the parasites draining the life blood from the economic health of their own state. If we were to reallocate the prison population to these resources, therefore displacing the useless dredge currently occupying them, the buildings would be able to serve double duty: to wit, housing the inmate population while serving, in addition, as a service outlet for students, the sick and those requiring fire and police related services. There would be no more call for prison reform, at least insofar as crowded prison conditions would be concerned.
Is this a perfect solution? Of course not. None of this takes into account the obvious issues of inmate training and supervision, the displaced individuals, previously raping the economy, re-designing issues of the structures at issue or the leap of faith necessary for the rest of our hard working population to embrace.
But this is what makes the United States great! This will represent our finest hour! This will represent the spirit of the American peoples’ ability to take a collective deep breath and sally forth with vigor, determination, courage, spirit, hard work, perseverance and good old fashioned American know-how!
posted by Marty Brounstein @ 3:47 PM
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