Marty's Bon Mots (Selections found in: Glad You Asked)

When Their Lips Move

It has been said that Michelle Bachmann is the candidate for those who feel that Sarah Palin is too intellectual.

The gaffes of hopeless foot in your mouth stupidity that comes out of her face is so hopeless that you could sit back and watch video tapes of these things while relaxed on your couch, cozied up with a bowl of popcorn. Here are just a few: “My husband and I have never gotten a penny of money from a family farm.” Actually her personal financial disclosure reports show that she holds an interest in the farm, that the farm received $259,332 in federal payments between 1995 and 2010, and that she earned income between $32,500 and $105,000 from it between 2006 and 2009.

"The president released all of the oil from the strategic oil reserve" No. President Obama approved the release of about 4%. "One. That's the number of new drilling permits under the Obama administration" No. It is well over 269.

"Five decades ago in America, we had less debt than we have today. We had $300 billion or less in debt. A gallon of gasoline was 31 cents." Adjusting for inflation, that 31 cents turns into about $2.25. And that $300 billion in national debt was 55% of the 1961 GDP. Today's $14 trillion in debt is 96% of the GDP. So she has a point, but the difference is not nearly as dramatic as she's implying.

Her claim that President Obama stated stimulus legislation would prevent unemployment from rising above 8%: No. In fact, President Obama never said that. She's referring to a projection, which was not even an official government assessment, issued by two aides before Obama took office.

“But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States. And I think it is high time that we recognize the contribution of our forebears, who worked tirelessly, men like John Quincy Adams, who would not rest until slavery was extinguished in the country." Many of the founding fathers were slave holders and abolishing slavery was the farthest thing from their collective minds. Further, John Quincy Adams was the sixth President of the United States, the son of founder John Adams. JQA might have been about 6 years old at the time of the Revolution.

Bachmann evoked the memory of beloved Western movie icon John Wayne at an in Waterloo Iowa. She told the audience, “… I want them to know is just like, John Wayne was from Waterloo, Iowa. That's the kind of spirit that I have, too." Except that his birthplace is nearly three hours away, in Winterset, Iowa. Serial killer and clown make-up enthusiast John Wayne Gacy, who was executed in 1994 after being convicted on 33 counts of murder was from Waterloo, Iowa. She has that kind of spirit?

"What people recognize is that there’s a fear that the United States is in an unstoppable decline. They see the rise of China, the rise of India, the rise of the Soviet Union and our loss militarily going forward." Bachmann fails to note, that the American public are not concerned about the rise of the Soviet Union in that the Soviet Union was dismantled over 20 years ago.

She referenced President Franklin D. Roosevelt and the "Hoot-Smalley" tariffs, creating regulatory burdens and tax barriers to business. Ridiculous. First of all the so-called “Hoot-Smalley” tariff was actually the Smoot-Hawley bill. That bill was proposed by Senator Reed Smoot of Utah and Rep. Willis Hawley of Oregon, both of whom were Republicans. It was then signed into law by Herbert Hoover. A Republican. In New Hampshire she advised that, “After all, you’re the state where the shot was heard ‘round the world at Lexington and Concord." No. These towns are in Massachusetts.

"I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out then under another Democrat president Jimmy Carter. And I'm not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it's an interesting coincidence." Blatant revisionist. The panic over swine flu that led to the initial bout of vaccinations happened in 1976 after an outbreak at Fort Dix during Gerald Ford’s Presidency. Carter continued on the already-active program when he entered The White House.

You all remember this one. “Before we get started, let's all say 'Happy Birthday' to Elvis Presley today. You can't do better than Elvis Presley.” That was the day he died. Happy deathday!

In July of 2011, Bachmann appeared on Fox News to discuss President Obama and to criticize some of his fiscal policies. Bachmann tried to throw in some Yiddish and tossed out the word ‘chutzpah’. But instead of pronouncing it correctly starting with the throaty "H” she pronounced it "choot-spa" causing millions to slap their foreheads in disbelief.

Her most recent misstatement revolved around the HPV vaccine. Not so much the vaccine itself as criticizing Rick Perry’s Texas mandate on administering this vaccine to adolescent Texas ladies. Never mind Perry’s clear overreaching. She insists she was approached by a tearful mother who advised that her daughter suffered “mental retardation” as a direct and proximate result of her having taken the dreadful vaccine. Yet another painful governmental intrusion on our personal right to live our lives. Hopeless. Of course she never produced the tearful mother. At least John McCain had the decency to produce Joe the Plumber despite the fact that Joe’s name was not Joe, didn’t have a plumber’s license and made claims so false as to embarrass most of us. Secondly, the claim is absolute nonsense and she’s been attacked by Pediatric societies and others, blaming her for attempting to smear facts with nonsense. She spins it nonetheless, advising she is merely conveying information and that she is neither doctor nor scientist.

Could have fooled me.

At this point, you can say to yourself, “Now, that’s entertainment!” Or you might say to yourself, “Hm. I don’t think that’s quite accurate.” Or you could say to yourself, “Wonder if there’s any blueberry pie left?” On the other hand you could just as easily say to yourself, “Politician, you don’t have a clue as to what you’re talking about. You don’t even care that everyone knows you don’t what you’re talking about. You’re just talking to get your face in front of the camera and everyone knows you are lying.

It’s the old joke. How do you when politicians are lying?

posted by Marty Brounstein @ 4:35 PM